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     37 AI-Powered Robot interacts with People during the Italian Tech Week 2024 at OGR
     38 Officine Grandi Riparazioni on September 26, 2024 in Turin, Italy.Stefano Guidi
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     41 
     42 Toward A Theory Of Kevin Roose
     43 
     44 [37][IMG]
     45 By [38]Albert Burneko
     46 
     47 11:15 AM EDT on June 18, 2025
     48 
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     56 
     57 "You can't be a serious critic," New York Times technology reporter Kevin Roose
     58 wrote on Tuesday, [44]on Bluesky, about artificial intelligence, "if you're in
     59 denial about how useful it is." Narrowly, in strict terms, this is true: You
     60 can't be a serious critic of anything if you are in denial about any part of
     61 it, where "in denial" describes an irrational and unfounded rejection of
     62 empirical reality. That's hardly even worth saying, but it's also not really
     63 what Roose is saying.
     64 
     65 What Roose wants is to put an entire suite of claims about the technology
     66 presently doing business as "artificial intelligence"—not just that it has more
     67 than zero uses (a thing nobody really denies) but that it truly is artificial
     68 intelligence or anything like it; that it represents a profound leap forward
     69 for technology and human endeavor; that it is the future; that, as such,
     70 adopting it and integrating it into day-to-day work and life processes is the
     71 smart move—beyond dispute. He wants to marginalize the many technology experts,
     72 media knowers, and sharp lay readers who have for years been calling his work
     73 on behalf of those claims appalling boobery. He wants his readers to view all
     74 of those critics as coterminous with whatever minor body of irrelevant
     75 five-follower internet loons might bother trying to argue the literal
     76 uselessness of a predictive text generator or a program that collates search
     77 engine results into layperson's language. He wants his readers to think of all
     78 the critics as united in an essentially pathological relationship with the
     79 observable world. And he wants the juice of dancing this shitty little
     80 passive-aggressive jig on Bluesky, the social-media platform where many of
     81 those critics will encounter his work and, while dunking on it, also share it
     82 around to some number of people who will read it.
     83 
     84 Why do this crap? I think that I would be embarrassed. I think that after I'd 
     85 [45]gassed up cryptocurrency and NFTs in the New York Times and told New York
     86 Times readers that the Bing search engine was trying to [46]steal me away from
     87 my wife, I would have asked my editor if maybe I could cover the Broadway beat
     88 for a while instead of continuing to smirk at the world while pouring fire ants
     89 down the front of my shorts for a living. So: Why do it? But also: How?
     90 
     91 I think about these questions a lot, certainly more than I should. (Not just
     92 about Kevin Roose! Sometimes also about Felix Salmon.) Some two decades since
     93 the digital-media attention economy took shape and, sheesh, like 13 years into
     94 my own career working in that economy, the list of the cold incentives that
     95 might drive a journalist toward this type of routine—attention, website
     96 traffic, access to industry honchos otherwise not inclined toward talking to
     97 the press, the possibility of later getting a nice job from one of them—is
     98 depressingly easy to conjure. But that list's plausibility as a Kevin Roose
     99 Explainer is, for me, limited by my fixed standing assumption that other people
    100 have and value dignity.
    101 
    102 Something occurred to me the other day when I was thinking about this—not even
    103 Tuesday! Not even prompted by this particular Kevin Roose Bluesky post!—and has
    104 been sort of following me around since, making me feel squirmy and
    105 uncomfortable and haunted. What occurred to me was the possibility that what
    106 had seemed, to me, like it could only come from a chilling and impossible level
    107 of cynicism might come instead from a perverse and even more chilling variety
    108 of mostly genuine belief. Not in the transformative power of AI! I'm talking
    109 about something wider and deeper and more frightening than that: a genuine and
    110 horribly earnest belief in not believing in anything.
    111 
    112 My suspicion, my awful awful newfound theory, is that there are people with a
    113 sincere and even kind of innocent belief that we are all just picking winners,
    114 in everything: that ideology, advocacy, analysis, criticism, affinity, even
    115 taste and style and association are essentially predictions. That what a person
    116 tries to do, the essential task of a person, is to identify who and what is
    117 going to come out on top, and align with it. The rest—what you say, what you
    118 do—is just enacting your pick and working in service to it.
    119 
    120 I was thinking about a lot of different stuff. I was thinking about the
    121 phenomenon of small-fry sports-bettor bros with no passion for any serious
    122 right-wing politics going big for Donald Trump in 2024 based on a view of their
    123 vote as something like a wager, and of Trump as the bold, ambitious
    124 choice—risky, but with the bigger potential payout. I was thinking about
    125 sophisticated, high-achieving tech-industry types abruptly throwing off all of
    126 their (thin, half-cooked, fundamentally dogshit, but still) liberal-libertarian
    127 politics to get behind an explicitly authoritarian program and help build its
    128 surveillance state. I was thinking about bushy-tailed go-getter types in legacy
    129 media who kept their language carefully bland around policing reform,
    130 anti-racism, and social justice during those topics' brief heightened salience
    131 around the George Floyd protests, and then smoothly pivoted to criticizing the
    132 excesses of woke when the winds changed. I was thinking about randos whom Elon
    133 Musk would not cross a sidewalk to piss on if they were on fire, who, when
    134 Trump invited Musk to gut federal government agencies and programs that benefit
    135 their own lives, rushed to tweet GIFs of Musk, like, dunking on somebody's head
    136 at his critics. I was thinking about [47]bag culture. And I was thinking about
    137 Kevin Roose, serially and with apparent enthusiasm donning each next pair of
    138 gigantic clown shoes handed to him by this or that Silicon Valley titan, and
    139 dancing in them long past the point when everybody else figured out it was all
    140 on behalf of a grift.
    141 
    142 To these people this kind of thing is not cynicism, both because they believe
    143 it's just what everybody is doing and because they do not regard it as ugly or
    144 underhanded or whatever. Making the right pick is simply being smart. And not
    145 necessarily in some kind of edgy-cool or subversive way, but smart the very
    146 same shit-eating way that the dorkus malorkus who gets onto a friendly
    147 first-name basis with the middle-school assistant principal is smart. They just
    148 want to be smart.
    149 
    150 So these people look at, say, socialists, and they see fools—not because of
    151 moral or ethical objections to socialism or whatever, or because of any
    152 authentically held objections or analysis at all, but simply because they can
    153 see that, at present, socialism is not winning. All the most powerful guys are
    154 against it. Can't those fools see it? They have picked a loser. They should
    155 pick the winner instead.
    156 
    157 Likewise, when all the rich guys got behind cryptocurrency, and all the rich
    158 cryptocurrency guys got behind Donald Trump, for these people the thing to do
    159 was very obvious, even if they had previously regarded crypto as a scam: not
    160 just to buy some cryptocurrency—the kind of move any cynic might make—but to
    161 adopt the attitudes and positions of a crypto enthusiast. Neither their
    162 conscience nor their concept of dignity troubles them in this switcheroo,
    163 because they take for granted that this is the precise way everyone forms the
    164 stuff they say and appear to think. In their view, someone like me dumps on
    165 cryptocurrency not because of an analytical conclusion that it sucks and is a
    166 scam, or because of a moral conclusion that as a scam it is reprehensible, but
    167 because I am making a pragmatic prediction that it will fail; my arguments for
    168 it being bad, in this view, are at best just the articulation of the reasons
    169 why I think it will not win.
    170 
    171 Personally, when Donald Trump won the 2024 presidential election and threw open
    172 the regulatory gates for crypto, I saw it as a bleak and bitter vindication of
    173 crypto skepticism: Critics had always been right to have identified it as a
    174 tool of predators and scam artists, and now, in its embrace by the most brazen
    175 undisguised crook in American society and the gleeful removal of all safeguards
    176 protecting people from it, everyone could see it for what it is. For the
    177 specimens we are examining here today, they saw almost the exact opposite: not
    178 just a victory for crypto and its boosters, but an actual self-evident
    179 refutation of crypto skeptics' arguments—for the simple reason that these
    180 people understood those arguments to have always been at root a prediction that
    181 crypto would lose, and crypto had won.
    182 
    183 This has not been how I have approached my life—I think that's sort of
    184 painfully obvious—and I think in general it is mostly not how people approach
    185 their lives. I think in general even really flawed and derelict people like me
    186 are trying to figure out what's right or what's best or what's just or what's
    187 fair, or at least some workable compromise between the demands of those pesky
    188 ideas and our desire for near-term comfort and stability. I think in general
    189 people only form associations on the basis of what they think will win in
    190 certain discrete circumstances, like betting on a horse race or making
    191 stock-market trades or whatever; the rest of life is more complicated than
    192 that. You vote for the candidate you think will represent your interests in
    193 government and you hope they will win; you do not try to figure out who is
    194 going to win and then vote for them. You praise the beauty of an artwork
    195 because you think it's beautiful, not because you expect it will smash
    196 auction-price records. You root for the Sacramento Kings because you are a sick
    197 pervert, not because you believe they will ever win the NBA Finals.
    198 
    199 And so, for probably most people, it would be sort of uncomfortable to, for
    200 example, shrug off the social ideas you'd vocally advocated for and throw
    201 yourself behind a political movement in direct opposition to all of them! Not
    202 only on principle—you'd actually believed that stuff, after all—but because of
    203 things like dignity and even vanity: People in general do not want to look like
    204 turncoats, scumbags, or frontrunners. Likewise, for probably most people, the
    205 dissolution of a succession of huge tech-industry hypes having exposed you as a
    206 [48]world-historic stooge and imbecile might temper your eagerness to deliver a
    207 public Funkmaster Flex routine on behalf of AI companies! Not even for
    208 particularly admirable reasons; you might just be tired of looking like a
    209 world-historic stooge and imbecile in the New York Times.
    210 
    211 But now imagine believing that victory, whenever it arrived and on whatever
    212 terms it was accomplished, would automatically redeem all that debasement. If
    213 you believed that Trump winning would mean that everyone who supported him was
    214 right to have done so, because they had picked the winner; that the mega-rich
    215 AI industry buying its way into all corners of American society would mean that
    216 critics of the technology and of using it to displace human labors were not
    217 just defeated but meaningfully wrong in their criticisms; that some celebrity
    218 getting richer from a crypto rug-pull that ripped off hundreds of thousands of
    219 less-rich people would actually vindicate the celebrity's choice to participate
    220 in it, because of how much richer it made them. Imagine holding this as an
    221 authentic understanding of how the world works: that the simple binary outcome
    222 of a contest had the power to reach back through time and adjust the ethical
    223 and moral weight of the contestants' choices along the way. Maybe, in that
    224 case, you would feel differently about what to the rest of us looks like
    225 straight-up shit eating.
    226 
    227 This, I think, is how a guy like Kevin Roose can do what he does without
    228 apparent embarrassment, without ever seeming to have learned anything or to
    229 have been chastened in the least by a series of cigars exploding in his face
    230 right after he told everyone in the world that smoking these
    231 guaranteed-not-to-explode cigars was the way of the future. He is playing the
    232 long game. Non-fungible tokens turned out to be a musical-chairs scam, Web3
    233 nothing more than a Sony PlayStation in helmet form, crypto at best a
    234 speculative asset class and at worse a wilderness of Ponzi schemes. AI might
    235 turn out to be just the ruinous money-pit Potemkin singularity that critics and
    236 scholars and experts (and I) think it is.
    237 
    238 My theory of Kevin Roose is this: His bet is not on any of these individually,
    239 but on the very rich and very powerful men and institutions backing them. He
    240 thinks they are going to win, and that when they do win, it won't matter that
    241 the rest of us regarded his sucking up to them as a disgrace to journalism and
    242 human dignity. He is, I suppose I must grant, being very smart.
    243 
    244 Recommended
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    246 [49]The Machines
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    249 Only Kevin Roose’s Editors Despise Him More Than I Do
    250 
    251 [51]213Comments
    252 [52]Albert Burneko
    253 April 25, 2025
    254 [53]A robot dances onstage
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    267 [60]Albert Burneko
    268 [61]@albertburneko.bsky.social
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    445 [44] https://bsky.app/profile/kevinroose.com/post/3lrsppq6sus2j
    446 [45] https://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2022/03/18/technology/cryptocurrency-crypto-guide.html
    447 [46] https://www.nytimes.com/2023/02/16/technology/bing-chatbot-microsoft-chatgpt.html
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