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   I Finally Reached Computing Nirvana. What Was It All For?

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   [38]Paul Ford
   [39]Ideas
   Apr 1, 2022 7:00 AM

I Finally Reached Computing Nirvana. What Was It All For?

   Breakfast, it turns out. The answer is breakfast.
   illustration concept of an optimal computer system
   Illustration: Elena Lacey

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   Like many nerds before me, I spent a goodly portion of my life
   searching for the perfect [40]computing system. I wanted a single tool
   that would let me write prose or programs, that could search every
   email, tweet, or document in a few keystrokes, and that would work
   across all my devices. I yearned to summit the mythic Mt. Augment, to
   achieve the enlightenment of a properly orchestrated personal computer.
   Where the [41]software industry offered notifications, little clicks
   and dings, messages jumping up and down on my screen like a dog begging
   for a treat, I wanted calm textuality. Seeking it, I tweaked. I
   configured.

   The purpose of configuration is to make a thing work with some other
   thing—to make the to-do list work with the email client, say, or the
   calendar work with the other calendar. It's an interdisciplinary study.
   Configuration can be as complex as programming or as simple as checking
   a box. Everyone talks about it, but it's not taken that seriously,
   because there's not much profit in it. And unfortunately, configuration
   is indistinguishable from procrastination. A little is fine but too
   much is embarrassing.

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   I spent almost three decades configuring my text editor, amassing 20 or
   so dotfiles that would make one acronym or nonsense word concordant
   with another. (For me: i3wm + emacs + org-mode + notmuch + tmux, bound
   together with ssh + git + Syncthing + Tailscale.) I'd start down a
   path, but then there'd be some blocker—some bug I didn't understand,
   some page of errors I didn't have time to deal with—and I'd give up.

   A big problem I had was where to put my stuff. I tried different
   databases, folder structures, private websites, cloud drives, and
   desktop search tools. The key, finally, was to turn nearly everything
   in my life into emails. All my calendar entries, essay drafts, tweets—I
   wrote programs that turned them into gigs and gigs of emails. Emails
   are horrible, messy, swollen, decrepit forms of data, but they are
   understood by everything everywhere. You can lard them with
   attachments. You can tag them. You can add any amount of metadata to
   them and synchronize them with servers. They suck, but they work. No
   higher praise.

   It took years to get all these emails into place, tag them, filter them
   just so. Little by little I could see more of the shape of my own data.
   And as I did this, software got better and computers got faster. Not
   only that, other people started sharing their config files on GitHub.

   Then, one cold day—January 31, 2022—something bizarre happened. I was
   at home, writing a little glue function to make my emails searchable
   from anywhere inside my text editor. I evaluated that tiny program and
   ran it. It worked. Somewhere in my brain, I felt a distinct click. I
   was done. No longer configuring, but configured. The world had
   conspired to give me what I wanted. I stood up from the computer,
   suffused with a sort of European-classical-composer level of emotion,
   and went for a walk. Was this happiness? Freedom? Or would I find
   myself back tomorrow, with a whole new set of requirements?
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   The more “professional” a piece of software is intended to be, the more
   likely it is to be scriptable. CAD tools or 3D programs will provide
   whole languages just for configuration. But the huge consumer products,
   the operating systems themselves, are more and more locked down. The
   reasons are multiple—money, security, simplicity. A lot of our
   computing is done on someone else's terms. We describe it with carceral
   words. To assert control over your device, you “jailbreak” out.

   I wonder if this is one of the reasons people get into [49]crypto—they
   dream of a new world that can be customized like software. Programmable
   money, self-executing contracts, little scripts that rearrange reality.
   In DAOs (decentralized autonomous organizations), people use code to
   make social rules, then buy or do things with their consolidated
   digital might.

   A lot of my friends hate all this stuff (perhaps [50]NFTs more than
   DAOs) with great passion; they see it as a closing off, a betrayal of
   the open, trust-driven nature of the early web. Others love it, seeing
   it as a continuation of the community-building, empowering nature of
   the early web. What I see is a generation of configurers coming into
   their own. Older web folks expected to create the new digital economy;
   these younger ones are trying to create the new economy economy. Their
   dream is a more perfect union where humans will, because of computers,
   stop acting in the ways we've been acting since we came out of the
   trees. Then again, $200 million in NFTs were stolen the day I drafted
   this column.

   When in history have we been able to schedule folly? Sometimes the only
   way to end the vacation is to drive the RV off a cliff.

   Perhaps by the time you read this the NFTs will have been returned.
   That would be a good reconfiguration. But the likely outcome of the
   boom is that some people will cash out at the right time and become
   convinced that they hold the keys to the universe and will lecture us
   for the rest of our lives, and most people (like those who had their
   NFTs stolen) will be humbled, or at best break even. When in history
   have we been able to schedule folly? Sometimes the only way to end the
   vacation is to drive the RV off a cliff.

   While the youth reconfigure society, I'm done configuring. A month has
   gone by since the click, and the urge to tweak is gone. My system looks
   like something from the '80s (a lot of it is from the '80s), but I
   finally got my room just the way I like it.

   Here's what I mean. Say I search for the word “database”; 7,222 emails
   pop up. Most are from marketers and industry mailing lists proclaiming
   some technological triumph, but nestled among them are messages from
   me, or to me, about learning to use databases—XML databases, SQL
   databases, and so forth. When I read these old messages, I am always
   surprised at how little I've changed, how consistent my obsessions are.
   There's something valuable to me in just seeing that, in seeing how the
   world keeps trumpeting the new while the self stays the same. You'd
   think there'd be at least five new me's by now, given how often I've
   vowed to become better. But no. I've been writing about configuring my
   text editor since 1996. I've been running my mouth about databases at
   least that long. They say you can't dip your hand in the same river
   twice, but they rarely mention that it's the same hand doing the
   dipping.
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   Since the emails are, well, just emails, sometimes I hit Reply (by
   typing “r”). On a thread that went dormant a decade ago. I don't always
   offer context. Sometimes I just write, “Curious … how did this turn
   out?” I used to feel I was intruding, to just drop in like that. But
   what the hell. It's been a long pandemic. No one has to write back.

   Out go the emails. Most get no reply; some get a bounce-back. But often
   enough, people respond at length. Some left the city and came back.
   Some are up for coffee. A surprising number are now cyborgs
   (pacemakers, hearing aids). Some are rich, some are broke, some are
   divorced. One is considering being frozen after death, some are
   considering getting into crypto, and one has moved to Miami. None of us
   understand our children.

   I'm thinking of starting a Sunday morning waffle breakfast for
   [55]vaccinated people to come stare at each other. It's one thing to
   email after 10 years, but everyone appreciates an invitation to
   breakfast. Maybe I'll set up some sort of internet-connected LED
   scrolly screen, like they put on food carts, so out-of-towners can
   leave messages. I gotta have something to configure.

   If you'd asked me, back when I was still configuring, not yet
   configured, exactly why I was nurturing these dozens of dotfiles, I'd
   have had a hard time telling you. I would have said: I want a pure and
   sleek experience. I want the computer working for me, augmenting my
   dumb brain with its immense arithmetical speed. I want access to my
   whole digital self. So I am very surprised that the terminal result of
   my efforts is not some sort of ecstatic communion with the internet, or
   even with my own computer. The function of my whole big orchestrated,
   tagged, integrated system was merely to rekindle old ties. What was all
   that configuration for? It was, in all sincerity, for waffles.
     __________________________________________________________________

   This article appears in the April 2022 issue. [56]Subscribe now.
     __________________________________________________________________

   More Great WIRED Stories
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   [67]Paul Ford is a writer, programmer, and software entrepreneur. He
   lives in Brooklyn.
   Contributor
     *

   Topics[68]magazine-30.04[69]crypto[70]NFTs[71]software[72]Web3

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