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313 lines
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#[1]alternate [2]alternate [3]Deadspin - All stories
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Locker
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Spend Exactly None Of Your Time Killing Time
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By
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[52]Chris Thompson
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PublishedJanuary 25, 2019
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We may earn a commission from links on this page.
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Image for article titled Spend Exactly None Of Your Time Killing Time
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Illustration: Chelsea Beck (GMG)
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Here’s a good resolution, if you’re the sort of person who resolves to
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do good and healthy things and then maintains any hope of actually
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doing them: Resolve to divide your waking hours exactly and only
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between doing things you should be doing, and doing things you want to
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be doing.
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Watch
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What Jason Kelce’s retirement says about the Eagles future
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(BUTTON) CC
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Share
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Subtitles
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* Off
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* English
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Share this Video
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[53]Facebook[54]Twitter[55]Email
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[56]Reddit[57]Link
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[58]view video
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[59]What Jason Kelce’s retirement says about the Eagles future
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Which NFL team lands Jim Harbaugh as their next head coach?
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January 10, 2024
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Josh Allen, Trevor Lawrence, or the Eagles: Who are the biggest frauds
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of the season?
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January 8, 2024
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When you are not doing something you should be doing—straightening up
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around the house, taking out the garbage, walking the dog, your job—you
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should always and only be doing something you actively want to be
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doing, like reading a book, or playing video games, or pursuing a
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hobby. Conversely, when you are not doing something you want to be
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doing, you should always and only be doing something you should be
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doing. This is a good resolution because it’s not aimed at some
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specific result that deviates a whole lot from who you are already,
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like overhauling your diet or your sleep regimen or whatever. No
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overhaul required, here. You already do plenty of what you’re supposed
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to do, and plenty of what you want to do. Resolve to stop doing
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anything else.
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Advertisement
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But I already do this, you are saying, as you sit at your desk, not
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working, procrastinating, avoiding work by dicking around on the
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internet and winding up on a dumb-ass late-January blog about, of all
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things, self-improvement. No! Right now, you are not following this
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very good advice. You are not doing what you should be doing—unless
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what you should be doing is reading blogs—nor are you doing what you
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really want to be doing, which is parasailing or skiing or hunting
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moose in [60]ye olde cowboy game. You are killing time, waiting for
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either the energy for work or the consequences of not doing work to
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give your life some feeble structure. Stop it! Killing time is the very
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habit we are trying to address, here. There’s barely enough time as it
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is.
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Advertisement
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Along the way you will need to hone your sense of what things you
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should be doing. You know the most obvious ones—they’re occupying the
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margins of your consciousness all the time, bearing down on you and
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poisoning the time you spend not doing them. Chores, assignments,
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projects, bills, phone calls, repairs, and so forth. The list is a
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little bit longer than that, which is both good news and bad news. It’s
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bad news because it includes things like talking to your folks on the
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telephone, or listening patiently while your spouse rants about their
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day, or brushing your teeth—things you put off doing nearly as much as
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work but which, I’m afraid, must be done. But it’s also good news,
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because by acknowledging that those are responsibilities, you have also
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earned the right to take some satisfaction from having fulfilled them.
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Advertisement
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Sometimes you have the bandwidth and energy to address your attention
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to the things you should be doing, and other times the thought of
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getting your car inspected or working out or washing a sinkful of
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dishes fills you with a sudden urge to throw yourself down a well. When
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you have the energy to do the things you should do, do them, or keep
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doing them. When you don’t—and this is crucial—go ahead and give
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yourself permission to set them aside for another time. But—and this is
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also crucial, because it is the lesson of this damn blog—when you give
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yourself permission not to do the things you should be doing, please
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spend the resulting block of free time doing something good and cool,
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something you genuinely want to do.
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You will also need to hone your sense of what it is you want to be
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doing. Today, the thing I most want to be doing in all the universe is
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riding Splash Mountain. That activity, I am afraid to say, is
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completely out of the question, in no small part because I am supposed
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to be doing the thing I least want to do in all the universe, which is
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working. Since I would certainly rather die than actually work, I’m
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going to do something else. But what? It helps to start all the way out
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at riding Splash Mountain, because understanding want in terms of
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genuine desire keeps you from slipping into the shitty headspace of
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just measuring activities against the dread and misery of work. In
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almost all cases I would rather be watching Law & Order reruns than
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doing chores, but that doesn’t mean I really want to be watching Law &
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Order reruns. In the endless list of things I could conceivably do with
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a day, watching Law & Order reruns is probably closer to doing chores
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than it is to riding Splash Mountain. In fact, I often default to
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watching Law & Order reruns because some part of my brain recognizes
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that it keeps me anchored in place near the chores, and isn’t so joyful
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that I can be said to be really enjoying myself, which is clearly
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something I don’t deserve.
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Advertisement
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So it is with scanning headlines or surfing Instagram or refreshing
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Twitter, the grey shit you do compulsively when you are
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procrastinating. Yes, you would rather be doing those things than
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painting your living room—anything, including bleeding from the
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eyeballs, is better than painting—but that doesn’t necessarily mean
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they’re worth a shit. If you’re not going to paint the living room,
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that’s fine! But now use the time on something good! In my case, if I
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start all the way out at riding Splash Mountain and work backward from
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there, long before I get to watching Law & Order reruns, I will arrive
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at things like bowling or going to the movies or hunting moose in ye
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olde cowboy game. Those are things I find myself wanting to do, but
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rarely give myself permission to do. Ask yourself, “What are some
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activities that would be genuinely fun?” Make a list! Cross off the
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stuff you know you can’t do, and then pick and do one of the ones you
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can. Go to the zoo. Watch a horror flick. Try out a new bar. Read a few
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chapters of a good book.
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It can feel reckless and irresponsible to spend your day bowling or
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baking or hunting moose in ye olde cowboy game, but a big chunk of the
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guilt associated with these activities stems from not really giving
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yourself permission to do them, at least in part because too much of
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your average day is already given over to tweeting at Jonathan Chait.
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But it’s healthy and productive to do cool and fun things that enrich
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your life! The solution, here, is to buy yourself the time to do the
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really interesting things by first being honest with yourself about all
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the sweaty hours you waste tweeting at Jonathan Chait. You are a
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successful and prolific time-killer because you’ve got a selection of
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ways of doing it that are marginally less dreary and more stimulating
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than folding laundry or managing spreadsheets, and some inherited
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puritanical impulse that tells you you’re still close to upright so
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long as you’re not actually enjoying yourself. Bullshit! When you are
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not doing what you are supposed to do, do something you genuinely want
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to do. That’s the rule.
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Advertisement
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Of course, there will be any number of times when you are prevented
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from doing any of the things you want to be doing. The rule is also
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this: When you cannot do what you genuinely want to do, do what you are
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supposed to do. Here is a good life hack: when you lack the bandwidth
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to take on an important chore or duty, you probably still have the
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bandwidth to make a list of all your important chores and duties. Do
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that! This counts as a thing you should be doing, because often enough
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in making the list you will hit on something that requires little
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enough of you that you can take it on right away, without too much
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suffering. And even if you don’t, the making of the list will bring you
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a little closer to addressing yourself to the items on it, and that’s
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enough of a positive step that when the time comes for you to do
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something you want to do, you will feel the satisfaction of having
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earned it, through work. That’s what’s missing from the shame-soaked
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hours spent avoiding and procrastinating: the feeling that you deserve
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to have a good time, and the permission to have one.
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Of course, you will probably fall short of dividing your time exactly
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equally between responsibilities and pursuits. Don’t think of that as
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failure. When you remember this wise practice, when it occurs to you,
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treat it as a rule and follow it. Ah, right, I said I wasn’t gonna sit
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here stewing in my anxiety all afternoon, so instead I’m going to go
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see [61]Into the Spider-Verse. Good plan! You are going to end the day
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with something to show for it, and that’s the whole idea.
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(BUTTON)
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Continue reading
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